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Aprilyn
Regular
Joined: Oct 20, 2003
Posts: 135
Points : 0
Location: Baton Rouge
Status: Offline
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 Posted:
Mon Oct 18, 2004 9:54 am
Post subject: Is Hell Exothermic or Endodermic? |
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You have to love the fertile imagination of the college student.
The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington:
Chemistry mid-term. The answer by one student was so "profound" that the
professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course,
why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well.
Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs
heat)?
Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas
cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.
One student, however, wrote the following: "First, we need to know how the
mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls
are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we
can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave.
Therefore, no souls are leaving.
As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different
Religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state
that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since
there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to
more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With
birth and death rates as they are, we can
expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially.
Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's
Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay
the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are
added.
This gives two possibilities:
1) If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls
enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until
all Hell breaks loose.
2) If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in
Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.
So which is it? If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my
Freshman year that, "it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you,"
and take into account the fact that I still have not succeeded in having an
affair with her, then #2 above cannot be true, and thus I am sure that Hell
is exothermic and will not freeze over.
THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY "A."
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